Communication is something you should have with every child. As a mother, communication might go astray a little bit at some point in your daughter’s life. Here are some helpful ways for improving communication that will leave a door open for talking at any stage in her life.
It is really important that your daughter knows you are never going to judge her. There is already too many judgmental people around us every day. If she thinks what she tells you is going to be faced with ridicule, she is going to start keeping things to herself. I lived this, nothing I did was good enough and everything I said was a lie. I was put down more than lifted up. Girls want acceptance and approval from their mothers primarily, but both of her parents as well. You don’t have to agree with everything she does or says, but it is important that when she does open up to you, you try to see her side of it.
Don’t Be Too Emotional
This is important for girls at any age. When trying to get your daughter to open up to you, you might do it by asking her certain questions. It is okay to ask her questions and see if she wants to talk about something. Never grill your child, you will never get answers. Keep your own personal distrusts or emotions out of it. Even if you are happy, sad, or, angry don’t let that be the focus. If you do, she might be less willing to share with you because of how your emotions will react when she tells you things.
Everyone Has Flaws
As girls, we don’t always open up because we think we are the only ones experiencing certain things. This can be a wide range of issues including, trouble with friends, failing in school, having boy problems, or body image issues. Show your daughter that she isn’t facing these things alone and that we are all flawed and have a lot of different things to deal with. Don’t complain about your flaws, but show that you understand you aren’t perfect, nobody is. Let your daughter know she is not alone and you are always there to talk about anything when she is ready.
Avoid Loaded Questions
Sometimes you need to ask her questions about certain things just open up the conversation. However, if you are too serious, ask loaded questions, she might back off saying anything. Instead of that approach, try to ask her more curious questions. Pretend the topic isn’t a big deal and that you aren’t trying to make any assumptions. If you do this, she might be a little more willing to open up to you.
Growing up, I communicated better with my father than I did my mother. I am making sure that the communication between my daughter and myself is not the same relationship I had. I want my daughter to feel comfortable and happy.
These concepts can be applied to mother and son, father and daughter or father and son. You just need to keep an open mind when improving communication.